As My Mom Would Have Wanted

My brother Ron called this morning to let me know that Mom passed away sometime before 5:30am this morning. When I spoke to Mom last night on the phone she was uncomfortable and too weak to do anything unaided. When I asked, she told me that she didn't like to tell me her troubles. She never spoke of her own concerns.

Everyone loved my Mom. She was always ready to listen intently to anyone. Everyone who met her cherished her. She's the kindest person I ever knew. She was a better person than I deserved to have as my Mom. I was never as good at putting others first and listening in tranquility. My Mom had the self-control to never say a harsh word, something I'm still learning.

My Mom loved her four boys more than anything. My Dad had passed away more than a decade ago. Mom and Dad courted while working together as journalists at the home town newspaper, which my Mom's grandfather founded. My Mom wrote the society page. My Dad was a farm journalist and a farmer. My parents were active in forming the natural foods movement in the 1950s, long before organic was fashionable or even called organic. Our family farm is the largest organic farm in the Midwest.

Mom's father was a doctor and got the farm as his place in country. Mom loved the farm so much that she married a farmer. When younger, she kept many horses and ponies there, which brought her joy and won many ribbons and trophies. I grew up with the horses and miss them. It's hard to comprehend how long ago that was, growing up on the farm and out doing things with my Mom.

In her last years, my brother Ron took care of Mom on the farm, for which I'm very grateful. Over the years she became weaker and older, which caused her distress. She didn't like not being able to do for herself and couldn't fathom being old. Mom passed away on the family farm in Illinois, which is where she wished to be when she died.

My Mom missed her friends who she'd outlived and didn't look forward to being a year older. In two weeks my Mom would have been 93. My Mom had the same name as her mother, Charlotte, but was called Barbara. Her mother also lived to her nineties, and as I recall she also passed away shortly before her birthday.

My Mom was born at her father's house on May 16, 1915, in Decatur, Illinois. Her sister Cecile passed away many years ago. My Aunt Cecile was also an amazingly kind woman and did a lot for me. Her brother Nelson, a doctor, passed away many years ago. My Mom was active in the community as a president of Study Class, a ladies group that studies foreign countries. She was the president of the local Audubon society. She was president of the local Girl Scouts.

Her four sons are Jack, Ron, Larry and myself. Jack is in real estate in New Iberia, Louisiana. Ron runs the family farm. Larry is the set designer at a nearby college theater department in Illinois.

Everyone who knew her will miss my Mom. In keeping with my family's philosophy of not making a show of personal troubles, I don't expect there to be a ceremony. My family is very private that way. My Mom was ready to go. She left her body to science. My Mom would want things to go on as normal.

ScreenPlayLab will go forward tomorrow as planned.

Love you guys!